I don’t often get emotional about things, and I try and remain rational not just for my sake but for the stability of the people around me. For the most part, I still am rational and stable but my brother is heading to the other side of the UK for university today and it is a little bit sad.

The little ginger child who was once absolutely terrified to leave his mum’s side for the first day of Nursery is heading to go spread his wings at Staffordshire University to study games design and heavily focus as much as he can on Virtual Reality games design.

It’s going to be incredibly weird that he isn’t just down the road anymore, or when I visit my mum’s he won’t just be sat in his room on his computer. He’s even selling that… Which is strange. That’s his life, his computer, but he doesn’t need it, it’s no longer as powerful or modern as it once was, and it’ll go unused. That’s quite sad, really, and I almost cried writing that.

I can’t quite put into words how I really feel about the whole situation, it’s incredible that he’s being brave enough to even attempt to move away and grow and become his own person – I am quite stagnant and didn’t take the university opportunity when I had it, and I often wonder what life would’ve been like if I did.

Today, Ross came to say goodbye to me as he left Norwich… He may not ever live here again, and only pop down for a visit. I spent my lunch break giving him a big hug and saying goodbye and I never really cry but I did today and I keep sitting and crying at my desk while I try and study my own degree – which is going really badly, thanks for checking in.

I’m so proud of him for being able to stand up and do what he wants to do right now and even if it doesn’t end up being the right thing in the end, he worked his hardest to make it happen despite so many physical, mental, emotional, and health setbacks.

I can’t wait to visit him and see what his little world is like once he’s settled. I’m excited for the long train journey to parts of the country I’ve never seen and to get to spend a night in university halls for the first time, despite being incredibly too old, and to just have my own taste of what real university life is like.

Despite studying my own degree I don’t get to experience real university life because I study mine as a distance learner through an apprenticeship, which makes my experience completely isolated and different and I don’t get to enjoy freshers week.

I doubt he’ll read this blog, I don’t think he even knows this website exists and if he does we’re both very respectful of each other’s internet privacy, allowing each other to have our spaces and we don’t spy on each other. A person’s internet space is very personal and unique and I don’t care what he does with his, or who he is on his, as long as he’s caring and respectful to others.

However I’d like to give him, or other people heading to university for the first time, some advice, from someone who never got to go to university properly:

1 / Enjoy Freshers week.

The biggest thing that I’m gutted I miss out on is Freshers week. It’s a great way to meet new people, have new experiences, find your way round the university, find out about the city you’re living in even if it’s your home town.

Whether you drink or you don’t there’s activities for you to take part in and make friends and I really wish I could have a freshers week. There’s often freebies and pizza trucks and tote bags and lanyards and leaflets and I’m a hoarder for these things and I know I’m not alone because they make a return every year.

2 / Clean your space after you use it

Make sure you keep everything you use and touch and enjoy clean. It can be difficult and off-putting and less of a priority when you have deadlines but it’ll keep your headspace clear and keep your housemates happy. Plus it’ll make you look like a good person, just don’t clean up after anyone else – that’s not your job.

You want to reduce the risk of getting ill while at university too, and keeping everything clean and using bleach and anti-bacterial sprays and gels and wipes will help prevent bugs. Going somewhere new and being around other people’s germs is a great way of getting ill quickly so do everything you can do reduce the risk.

In the same vain, shower regularly. No one wants a stinky housemate, and no one wants to be the stinky housemate. Clean yourself, your stuff, your space and feel good for it.

3 / Talk to the disability team

Whether you have a diagnosed disability, or you think there’s something you could receive support for – make sure you talk to the disability team. They are there to provide help and support. There’s so much help you can receive, including financial support or new tools and equipment to help you along your studies, or librarians to speak to when struggling with referencing, or even 1-to-1 sessions with a tutor to help you with your overall assignments.

I received a laptop and associated equipment, and if I wasn’t an apprentice I would’ve also received additional financial support along my journey. The financial support could be the difference between a packet of microwave rice for dinner one night, or an actually tasty portion of cheeky egg fried rice from the Chinese. You often don’t have to pay it back, either.

4 / Try to enjoy yourself

If nothing else, you can enjoy yourself at university. It’s a place away from your childhood home where you can finally just be who you want to be. Wear the fun clothes you’ve always wanted to wear but didn’t want your family to see you in. Cut your hair off or grow it out or dye it a fun colour. Get a ridiculous tattoo. Swear as much as you like. Drink as little or as much as you like. As long as you’re being a kind and respectful person, which I’m sure you will be, have fun with university. Be yourself. It’s ok, it’s finally safe. (I hope).